Hiatus: It's Official

People, I am taking the California bar.  If you aren't familiar with this monstrosity, it is the proverbial white whale that haunts wannabe California lawyers, often repeatedly.  It is actually considered the most difficult bar in the country, since California is full of arse-faces and the examiners are TRYING to keep people out as best they can.

Having decided to slay this whale, I will be occupied with a glorious 8-12 hours of studying each day. So, I will be taking a hiatus from blogging until it's all over.  Might pop in from time to time to say hi, but until August 2, all bets are off.  

Have a fab summer.  I know mine's gonna be a freakin' blast.

Ricky Martin is Gay

So, from the Old Ass News That Isn't News Dept, Ricky Martin has come out.

To paraphrase my li'l sis, didn't we all know that about 6 years ago?!

So, my saying that this IS NOT EFFING NEWS is truly unnecessary.

Erykah Badu Strips at JFK Assassination Site

To summarize, Erykah Badu stripped naked while filming the video of her song "Window Seat" at the Plaza where JFK was shot.  And some people (shocker ahead!) didn't like it.  Oh wait- no summary is needed.  Because that's the whole effing story.

Pretty sure that even in the Entertainment section of Huff Po, this IS NOT EFFING NEWS. 

Joe Biden Used F Word

It's been awhile, not because non-news isn't everywhere, but because actual news has abounded, as well.  We are now back to regularly scheduled programming...

So, in a shocker of all shockers, VP Biden said the F word.

As the Guardian points out, "Joe Biden is famous for having a mouth that out-runs his brain from time to time."

Guess what? NO ONE CARES.  No one gives a freaking damn what he said right before the President signed a huge health care bill into law.  Because IT'S NOT EFFING NEWS.

It's not interesting, it's not informative- it's not even new.  Hell, the Republicans can't even make this into a partisan issue, given Dick Cheney's "eff yourself" comment on the Senate floor.

(Many thanks to li'l sis Andrea & Daddy-O whose collective comment was: "You know what?! Big effing deal!")

Car Rental Companies Charging More Fees

In this fine piece of reporting, we discover that car rental companies are automatically charging customers for roadside assistance and insurance packages they never knew they were agreeing to.

To quote an already over-used phrase: No shit, Sherlock.

So, let's see what we've learned here:
1) People don't want to pay for shit they don't need;
2) Car companies need money so they are trying to screw us all; and
3) People need to read what they are signing.

So, basically, this is NOT EFFING NEWS because a) it's not new, and b) it's not noteworthy, and c) if you are too dumb to read your contract, you shouldn't be operating a lethal weapon, like, say A CAR.

Small Talk Leads to Unhappiness

In this supposed medical/health news, CNN has yet another Story About Something Everyone Already Knows. Too much small talk and not enough "deep conversation" apparently leads to unhappiness.

This is a direct quote: "The bottom line is that maintaining friendships can help with emotional well-being."

Well, holy effing hell, ladies and gents! We have a scientific breakthrough.

Oh, wait.  The article states that only 79 participants were studied and the result "meshes well with established ideas that happiness and social life are intertwined."  So we know we already know this.  Everyone knows we already know this. And yet a story was published on a news site about it anyway.  Because, really, why say something once when you can say it over and over and over?

The moral of this NOT EFFING NEWS story?

"Friends buffer negative events and provide support...Don’t be too busy to have a meaningful conversation."

Arizona Closing Rest Stops

It seems the state of Arizona is closing rest stops and residents don't like it.

This, according to the New York Times, is "US News."  It is, indeed, something taking place in the US.  I'm not sure it's not more appropriate for the local news in, um, ARIZONA.  You know, where the people care about how many places there are to pee between Phoenix and, ah...what's another city in Arizona?

To say this isn't national news should go without saying, but since it must be said, here we go:

Hey, NY Times! This is NOT EFFING NEWS.  Sure as hell isn't to people who don't live in, or drive through, Arizona.  And maybe not even to them.